Ashes in the closet.

How many of you are aware of someone housing a loved ones’ ashes – in a closet?
I have heard people say in passing…”yeah, I have ______’s ashes in my closet.”
It might pose a question in our minds and I think I understand the reason why they are in that closet.
For some, putting those ashes in a sealed urn…is….closure. Meaning, that is the end of the end.
For others, maybe it is a family member that you may have not even known? Maybe they passed on before you were even able to recall their existence, and the cremains have been passed down to you.
And another option – just as painful as the first – maybe you just can’t find an urn that does your loved one justice.
Or, last, and definitely not least. You don”t know what to do with the cremains.

As the protocol for what to do with the ashes of our loved ones has evolved through the years, scattering is an option that is very fitting for many. Yet having stored them in the dark brown plastic box from the crematory, and using that to scatter the ashes feels, well, not that great. Do you agree?
Or…throwing the scattering cardboard urn…in the garbage….
So, what to do?

Is it sacrilegious to place the ashes (or cremains) in a beautiful (and I am meaning one that speaks “respectful and reverent”…) vessel, scattering them in a ceremonial celebration… and then keeping the vessel for a future loved one? I know this is probably reaching into the far corners of the universe for some. But what about that? A family vessel? Used to scatter those we love? Yes there may be some intermingling of ashes throughout the life of the vessel. Is that so bad? We have used ceremonial pieces before. Using family baptismal gowns has been a traditional entry into a faith numerous times, and having the knowledge that others have lived in that gown before us…is similar to a rite of passage in itself. Or that wedding gown passed down for generations.  Or mother’s ring.
I know. The ring isn’t quite the same as an urn. But I think you get where I am going with this.
I, myself, feel this idea might be quite fitting.
Think about it….
Closet? Family Urn?
You decide….and let me know what you think.

Living fully – carving a life.



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